Noel's Nitemare

 Remember when you promised and then you shit on it? LOL I hope every time you remember what a liar you are, you can imagine me laughing at your fucking face and saying "I told you so"

 I dont know where to place this anger. Im not allowed to release it and im just sitting here going insane. I want to hit something until I break my own hand but then I'm just causing more problem. I'm confused why it seems like I'm the one that is being called crazy all the time. Am I? Update: Yea, I think I broke my hand lol and I've been crying for an hour straight. I cant even remember when was the last time I cried. I'm not crazy. I dont have to be.

 I wish there's something that can numb this other than what I've been taking because I've been taking it and I'm battered and bruised. It's never about how much I care about you compared to these substances. It was never a competition. It's only about how much I can function without feeling... I know I will pay for this one day. But I cant stop and I'm sorry