I'm not a cruel person but please don't make it an option

What is it about this apartment that makes me always want to write something? Why is it my heart is hurting for other people but not knowing when to stop?

I didn't even let her talk. Just started kissing her because that's what she wants, right? I gave everything I had because I wanted to feel something too. It's why I started these fuckfest in the first place. Let's have fun and make each other feel good. And she has been mislabeling her feelings for me. I don't believe that she's falling for me. It's weird and too fast. Yes, it's been 10 months since we had this kind of "deal" and I understand things can get confusing but a deal is a deal. Sometimes I want to get angry because I feel like she's making me feel bad when I have put everything on the table, in the front and she disrespect our deal. We have a deal! I am not capable of feeling more than a normal attention or maybe infatuation, and she can't hold that against me.

Note: She ruins one of my fav songs of LANY, "Super Far". One day she sent me a message and told me to listen to it because it's exactly what she's feeling. And damnit how TF that song even perfectly explains our situation ugh.


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